Navigating Body Image Struggles: Ishita Talwar's Journey
The Impact of Body Image on Mental Health
What may seem like a harmless comment about someone's physique can linger in their mind for years. Ishita Talwar, a 27-year-old, has experienced a tumultuous journey from being teased for her slim figure to grappling with weight gain, thyroid complications, and self-acceptance issues. Instead of enjoying a typical childhood, she became acutely aware of her body due to relentless scrutiny and remarks. Now, as she faces marriage, health challenges, and life in a new city, Ishita reveals that her toughest struggle is not the scale, but her self-perception.
In our conversation, Ishita's narrative lacked the typical dramatic transformation; instead, it was filled with sincerity and the weight of comments that others likely forgot. “Growing up in Bokaro Steel City, I was labeled as extremely skinny throughout my school years. It wasn’t just my appearance; it became my identity,” she shared.
Children would call her names like 'hanger', while adults suggested she eat more and add ghee to her meals. These seemingly trivial comments gradually altered her relationship with food and self-image. “Food ceased to be about hunger,” she explained. “It became a means of self-correction.” By the time she reached her senior year, stress eating had become a part of her life. Although she began to fit conventional beauty standards, this acceptance stemmed from imbalance rather than confidence.
In 2017, Ishita transitioned to Vadodara for college, which was initially overwhelming. “I struggled to adapt to the city and often skipped meals, relying on street food and whatever I could find in my PG accommodation,” she recounted. Her weight fluctuated based on her emotional state.
Ironically, food later became a source of healing. While assisting a friend with a food blog, Ishita began to explore the city, discovering cafes and routines that uplifted her emotionally. However, the pandemic brought its own challenges, leaving her feeling demotivated yet instilling some discipline. She adopted intermittent fasting, consumed simple meals like khichdi, exercised regularly, and gradually regained control over her body and mind. After joining a gym, she lost nearly 10 kilos over eight months, feeling stronger and more confident than ever.
However, her life took another turn when she returned to Delhi for work. Long hours, stressful commutes, and a sedentary lifestyle caused her hard-earned progress to slip away. “The weight began to return, especially around my abdomen, leading to discomfort in my own skin,” she reflected. Following her marriage last year, she faced additional scrutiny she hadn’t anticipated. “During wedding preparations, there were constant comments about not becoming a ‘fat bride’,” she recalled. “Simultaneously, people advised me to leave extra room in my clothes for the inevitable weight gain after marriage.” This contradiction drained her emotionally, as she was expected to shrink for her wedding while also preparing for societal expectations of post-marriage weight gain.
“What troubled me was how normal these comments seemed to everyone else,” she noted. “It heightened my awareness of my body during a time that should have been joyful.” Currently, Ishita weighs around 90 kilos and admits there are days when she avoids mirrors altogether. “I’ve attempted to restart my fitness journey numerous times, but I often feel like I’m failing,” she confessed.
After marrying, relocating from Delhi to Gujarat introduced another layer of emotional adjustment. New responsibilities, work pressures, and a shift in routine caused her to lose her rhythm once more. “There are days when instant noodles become my comfort food because I’m mentally drained,” she shared. She was surprised by how quickly physical discomfort manifested, experiencing constant back pain and muscle stiffness. “At 27, that’s alarming,” she said. Recently, she began medication for thyroid issues and supplements for Vitamin B12 and D deficiencies. “Coming to terms with this reality has been challenging. I never expected to face these issues at this age.”
Perhaps the most difficult aspect for Ishita is not the weight itself, but the internal dialogue she battles. “My mother encourages me to take care of myself, go for walks, and eat healthier. I genuinely want to change, but some days it feels like my body is working against me.” Listening to Ishita, it becomes evident that body image is rarely just about appearance. It fluctuates with stress, loneliness, work demands, hormones, marriage, and emotional survival. Often, casual remarks from others can leave deep, silent wounds. Her story illustrates how body shaming can profoundly affect one’s relationship with themselves over time. Beneath the weight fluctuations, diets, and self-doubt, Ishita continues to seek peace with a body that society has taught her to criticize.